Flu-tastic Jokes
Why did the flu go to school?
It wanted to improve its “sick-tionary”!
What do you call a sick dinosaur?
A “dino-sore”!
Why did the germ go to the party?
Because it wanted to spread some cheer!
What did the doctor say to the sick tomato?
“You need to ketchup on your health!”
Why did the doctor carry a red pen?
In case he needed to draw blood!
What do you call a sick cat?
A “purr-sick”!
How do you know when a cold is lying?
It’s always “sneezing” around!
Why did the patient bring a ladder?
Because they heard the doctor was going to give them a “high” dose!
Cold-Hearted Jokes
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a cold?
Frostbite!
Why did the cold apply for a job?
It wanted to get out of the freezer!
What did one cold say to the other?
“I’m ‘chillin’ here!”
Why did the ice cube break up with the cold?
It found someone cooler!
What do you call a cold that tells jokes?
A “pun-derful” flu!
Why are colds so good at math?
Because they know how to “subtract” symptoms!
What’s a cold’s favorite type of music?
Anything that’s “chill”!
Why did the cold get a promotion?
It was “on the rise”!
Medicine Mischief
Why did the pill go to school?
To get a little “tablet” education!
What did the cough syrup say to the throat?
“You’re going to be feeling ‘syrup-er’ soon!”
Why did the doctor always carry a pencil?
To draw prescriptions!
What did the medicine bottle say to the patient?
“You’re in for a ‘prescription’ of laughter!”
Why did the aspirin break up with the headache?
It couldn’t take the pressure anymore!
What did the doctor say about the flu shot?
“It’s the best ‘injection’ of humor!”
Why did the patient always bring a broom?
To sweep away the germs!
What did the nurse say to the patient who was feeling down?
“Don’t worry
you’re just going through a ‘medicinal’ phase!”
Hospital Humor
Why did the doctor bring a suitcase to work?
He was ready for a “patient” getaway!
What do you call a doctor who fixes websites?
A “doc-tor”!
Why did the hospital hire a musician?
To help with “sick” beats!
What’s a hospital’s favorite game?
Operation
of course!
Why did the doctor carry a ladder?
To reach new heights in patient care!
What did the patient say to the doctor on Halloween?
“I’m just here for a little ‘treat-ment’!”
Why did the doctor always carry a map?
To navigate through “sick” territory!
What do you call a hospital that only treats jokes?
A “laugh-atory”!
General Sick Jokes
Why did the sick chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side of the “sick-ness”!
What do you call a sick bee?
A “buzzed” bee!
Why did the couch get sick?
It caught a “case of the cushions”!
What do you call a sick superhero?
A “flu-hero”!
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Because it wasn’t peeling well!
What did the doctor prescribe for a sick computer?
A “byte” of medicine!
Why was the sick book feeling down?
It had too many “issues”!
What do you call a sick magician?
A “sick-tionist”!
Thanks for enjoying these dad jokes about being sick! Laughter is the best medicine
so if you’re looking for more humor
check out these dad jokes about beer or enjoy some cheesy laughs with dad jokes about cheese. Stay healthy and keep smiling!